Green Oasis

Here’s a love story, the kind you won’t hear about in a love song. The author’s spouse was made paraplegic in a car accident. He writes about how they suffered humiliations and frustrations and managed to live happily together. May my love be as resilient.

We know that most people—strangers, anywhere—will knock themselves out to help us if we explain what we need. We know to say “Yes” to nearly everything because there is probably a way to do it. We know there is happiness available every day, most of it requiring more effort than money.

(via kottke.org)

Valkenburg and Peter have an idea about this. They believe that the 21st century Internet encourages honest talking about very personal issues—feelings, worries, vulnerabilities—that are difficult for many self-conscious teens to talk about. When they communicate through the Internet, they have fewer sounds and sights and social cues to distract them, so they become less concerned with how others perceive them. This in turn reduces inhibition, leading to unusually intimate talk. This emotionally liberating frankness is healthy and tonic. (Coming of Age on the Internet)

I resemble that remark!

Compare and contrast with Snark Undermines Public Discourse.

1. This is an odd choice during wintertime, but I’m grateful for refrigeration. My life would be very different if we had never invented it.
2. I am happy to have a place to write. Even if what I write never reaches another sentient being, it is good therapy to have somewhere to express my thoughts. I guess all those exhortations from Mormon leaders to be a journal writer weren’t silly after all.
3. I am thankful to have two weeks off from work. Spending them on a staycation with my family has been good for me, even if we’ve been taking turns being sick.
4. Thank you to whomever turned me on to this idea of listing five things for which I’m grateful every week. I’m noticeably happier. I’m not immune to down times, but I’ve been more resilient. Or maybe that’s just the staycation talking. Either way, I’m happier right now.
5. I’m grateful for my new Macbook. Really, it’s on loan from my employer, but you know. Perhaps this is silly, but it’s made me feel more creative. Being able to sit on my couch and write stuff has somehow freed some extra creative juices. Go figure.

This morning found me contemplating happiness. Most of my life has been spent waiting to be happy. Many of my thoughts followed the pattern “Life will be so great when         !” That blank space has been many things. None of them have fulfilled my fantasies of finally achieving lasting happiness.

On the other hand, I sometimes fall into nostalgia. “Life was so much better back when         .”

Both of ways of thinking mean that I’m not happy right now.

Life isn’t a path leading to happily ever after or leading out from the Garden of Eden.

Here’s more proof that being rich ≠ happiness. It seems like human beings are not being human unless they’ve found some reason to be miserable at least some of the time. We’re not cut out to be perpetually happy.

(via kottke.org)